Insights

Content vs. Process: What Your Conflict Is Really About

Most couples, and honestly most people, believe that if they could just solve the issue, the conflict would finally calm down. The dishes. The tone....

How to Trust Yourself When You Don’t Know What to Do

There is a question, or different versions of the same question, that I get asked more often than people might imagine: "Do you ever just...

How Can I Feel Less Lonely with the Person I Love?

There is a particular kind of loneliness that shows up in many of my therapy sessions. It is the ache of sitting beside your partner...

What Would Our Relationship Feel Like If We Both Assumed the Best?

What would shift if both people in a relationship made it a habit to assume the best of one another? Take a second and imagine...

You’re Not Listening vs. You’re Not Hearing Me

In a recent session, a couple sat across from me, caught in that familiar loop so many of us know too well. He was frustrated,...

The Trouble with Urgency

A client once shared that after a heated exchange with her sister, she fired off a long text late at night. At the time, it...

What is "Meeting People Where They Are"?

In my practice, I talk often about the importance of meeting people where they are. Whether it is a parent with a child, a partner...

Loving Across Differences: The Hidden Work of Lasting Relationships

Couples often come to therapy hoping to improve their communication. And while that’s a worthy goal, I’ve noticed something deeper underneath most communication issues: We...

What to Do When You Can’t Get Yourself to Do the Damn Thing

You’re successful. People count on you. You show up when it matters, and you’re probably the kind of person others turn to for advice or...

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